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Recognizing gaslighting during a divorce

On Behalf of | Apr 25, 2023 | Family Law |

Divorce is an emotionally challenging process that can bring out the worst in people. One particularly damaging tactic that some individuals use during a divorce is gaslighting – a form of psychological manipulation designed to make someone doubt their own perceptions and memories.

If you suspect that your spouse is gaslighting you during your divorce, it is essential to take steps to protect yourself and ensure a fair outcome.

Understand gaslighting

Gaslighting is a manipulative behavior in which one person attempts to control another by making them question their own reality. In a divorce, this can manifest as a spouse insisting that certain events never occurred, accusing the other of overreacting or attempting to shift blame for their own actions. The goal of gaslighting is to create confusion and self-doubt, which can leave the targeted spouse feeling vulnerable and powerless.

Document everything

Keeping a detailed record of your interactions with your spouse can be invaluable in countering gaslighting attempts. Maintain a journal of conversations, events, and incidents that cause you concern. Collect emails, text messages and other written communications that provide evidence of your spouse’s manipulative behavior. This documentation can help you maintain clarity and may be useful if your divorce proceedings become contentious.

Focus on the facts

In the face of gaslighting, it is crucial to remain grounded in facts and objective information. Avoid engaging in emotional arguments or trying to convince your spouse of your perspective. Instead, concentrate on gathering evidence, organizing your financial records and understanding your legal rights.

If you suspect that your spouse is gaslighting you during your divorce, it is important to know ways you can protect yourself from the manipulation and work toward a fair resolution for your case.